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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/23511376">igni ferroque</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/seraf/pseuds/seraf'>seraf</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Series:</b></td><td>carthago delenda est [1]</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>The Magnus Archives (Podcast)</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>Arson, Burns, Canon Compliant, Character Study, Deleted Scenes, Friendship, Gen, Introspection, Pre-Canon, gay lesbian solidarity but like evil, talking about eldritch entities like you're in love with them</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>Completed</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2020-04-06</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2020-04-06</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-01 12:54:18</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>Mature</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>Graphic Depictions Of Violence</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>1</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>538</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/23511376</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/seraf/pseuds/seraf</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>( with fire and iron; describing scorched earth tactics ) </p><p>in his endeavors to escape the spiral, mike crew spends a period of time with the cult of the lightless flame. </p><p>an exploration of why jude has mike's home address and contact information in mag089.</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Relationships:</b></td><td>Michael "Mike" Crew &amp; Jude Perry</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Series:</b></td><td>carthago delenda est [1]</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Series URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/series/1694476</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Comments:</b></td><td>7</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>80</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>igni ferroque</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>when he first meets jude, he has not yet <em>become, </em>and she is laughing at him, the gleam of her teeth shimmering in the air like hot tarmac. he seeks them out of his own accord, as few ever do. ( he does not smell like destruction, like fire, just of ozone, but when one of them rests their hand on his back and sets his flesh sizzling, he doesn’t scream, and that is something to be respected, at least. )</p><p>( he wonders if this smell of cooking meat had been in the air when he was struck. )</p><p>jude talks about a <em>beauty, </em>in destruction, an all-consuming agony, a thrill that needed to be fueled, and it almost makes him feel … claustrophobic. <em>everything </em>matters, so much, to the scorched earth, every nerve ending on fire, every possession or human connection a possible source of heat, in the end. everything has <em>significance, </em>if only because that significance makes the destruction of it all the more beautiful.</p><p>it’s not for him.</p><p>he knows that from the first day, from the first lit match.</p><p>that <em>hunger </em>didn’t burn inside of him. to see things destroyed, to see what is concrete rendered to ash and melted fat. there was none of that <em>love </em>that lit jude’s face up with a sadistic kind of exultation, nothing for him in destruction. he stands beside them with his fingertips scalded, watching the remains of what had been someone’s home smolder, and there is - <em>something, </em>there, something reaching to him, but he finds he has no desire to embrace it. no desire to reach back.</p><p>none of them pretend that his stay will last very long.</p><p>he doesn’t have the nerve endings cauterized. doesn’t revel in destruction, be it literal or figurative. still, he gives it some time, long enough that his skin is too-warm to the touch, though not yet searing, long enough to learn that the fractals will return even over damage done by the entity of destruction.</p><p>there’s a longing there, briefly. but not as though he <em>wants </em>to be loved by the scorched earth, as though he should be, but - a desire to understand. to know what that deep kind of <em>faith </em>feels like.</p><p>he links pinkies with jude when he decides he’s leaving, refusing outright to ruin his whole hand, and she grins once again. <em>if you’re still alive in a few years, </em>she says cheerfully, as he nurses his bubbling skin, <em>i’ll buy you a drink.</em></p><p>when they next meet, she makes him pay for the drinks. he isn’t <em>technically </em>alive, she points out, and he knows well enough to concede on that point.</p><p><em>i understand now, </em>he says, simply, and she grins at him.</p><p><em>different god than mine, but - </em>and she raises an eyebrow, taking his void-touched eyes in, the way his hair is windswept, the way his feet don’t touch the ground, <em>as alternatives go, i’d say it’s a better choice than most.</em></p><p>mike snorts a little, at that, but nods. <em>it feels like love, </em>he states, quietly, the place between his ribs infinite and hollow and full of rushing air. <em>like an indescribable love. like i’ve … become something more than myself.</em></p><p>that much, at least, jude seems to understand.</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>one day i will write tma fic not about mike crew but not today</p></blockquote></div></div>
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